Tuesday, March 12, 2002

Happiness is not overrated >> depression is.

So it seems as though I have some kind of title for each of my logs, isn't that interesting? I think so. It takes a lot of time, thought, and tinkering to come up with something as brilliant as a brilliant title, also known collectively as the 3Ts. Now you would have guessed that I just made that up, but so goes for just about everything else that I usually add into my words to make them more interesting, just as spices enhance the flavor of the food, nonsense enhances the quality of my conversation.

Am I happy now? I should say, not really. Contented yes, and mostly in deep thought. It just dawned upon me the other day that my life is moving a bit quickly, as in, a lot quickly more like it, in a flash the new year was over and I'm finding myself in the third month of the year. How quick was that? Then I remembered someone told me that from now until when I'm 30 will be the quickest time of my life. I also remembered that someone told me that I will not amount to anything. So I guess there are certain things that I should never listen to what others say.

In fact I don't think I really do. At least for now. Is that a good thing, or is that a bad thing?

I encourage feedback so please send all your rants and raves to crickyt@elby.net . Do you want to know a secret? I have no idea what rant and rave means. I just assume that it means suggestions and criticisms. If I am wrong don't correct me coz I won't listen to you anyway.

Also on another advertising note please let people you think might benefit from reading the crap I write, know about this weblog so that I may enrich their lives with tales of happiness, sorrow, joy and laughter, blood and tears. No, let me think about it for a minute, well, less blood stories coz I probably won't have much to say unless I am bleeding profusely from an accident or from a sharp knock on my head after I subconsciously insult somebody while attempting to explain one of my theories by using a wrong analogy.

So let's talk about happiness. What makes you happy? I the last thing that made me happy was a good meal, the thing before was buying 2 rugs for less than RM20. I don't think I really remember anything before that. Yes, rugs and food. That's all in my mind right now if you're going to ask me.

I was at KL yesterday because believe it or not, I accidentally loaded my camera with a roll of black and white film I had intended to use on Friday in KL. So anyway, not wanting to leave the film in the camera for so long I thought to myself that I really needed to go out and take the pictures one way or the other. Now what prompted me to do that was on a Sunday night when I was having dinner out in the open, I looked up and saw the clearest, most beautiful sky I have ever seen. It was a blueish purple with orange clouds and it was so nice! So I thought, I should head over to KL Tower to take a nice landscape view.

And so the next day I did all the work in the office extra quick so that I could leave. And luckily there was someone standing by in the office so I actually *could* leave. Went to KL to finish the black and whites in the scorching sun. Man! It was like, you could just feel the radiation being absorbed into the skin...so I actually did speed walking and shooting coz I really didn't have much time to shoot and it was too hot to be lingering around anyway. After the roll was done, good riddance, I loaded the second roll of color film. By then I was already about 400 metres above the ground in KL Tower looking at what would seem as though to be a hazy skyline. A VERY hazy skyline. I could see perhaps the buildings immediately in front, but nothing quite like the skyline I had imagined all the beauty to be on that Sunday evening.

With that I decided that I would wait till nightfall to take some night pictures instead, because you can't see haze in the night, or so I hoped. No really. Well for about 2 hours I had to put up with tourists, tourists, and more tourists. Well, I DID look like a tourist, I have no idea why. But I was very proud of my white ticket as compared to the tourist-orange tickets. Somehow when you look like a tourist they speak to you slower. Do-you-want-a-listening-kit-Sir? was like an attempt to communicate to you in a foreign language they weren't sure about. Well anyway at least they were friendly, and I found it weird that they asked if ...let me make that, they joked-while-asking if I carried a knife. As I walked through the security gate that beeped incessantly due to my large bunch of keys and my mobile they kind of just let me go and jokingly asked 'you takde bawa pisau kan? ha ha ha ha ha', were the exact words they used. I smiled and said no. What a friendly interrogation!

So for 2 hours I had nothing to do, and I watched as people, tourists, some photographers, some would-be photographers, some people trying to be a photographer, now don't get me wrong I won't claim that I am a photographer nor a good one at that, but when someone pulls out a professional camera to take a night shot with a flash while trying to look like they are adjusting the camera to get the perfect shot, well...it just annoys me.

Plus these are my thoughts. It would be strange though if someone were critical of my thoughts. Well it isn't wrong, it's perfectly normal, but for someone to say, you shouldn't think like that, your thoughts are wrong. Is very strange indeed. I would say...okay, I will think differently then. In an honest and polite manner befitting my personality *ahem*

So anyway I took all the night shots I ever wanted, wasn't too happy about them because of the weather conditions and I think being holed up at high altitudes does make someone a little grumpy, I called it a night, had a slow drive home and watched the cars zip past me. Driving is sometimes very calming if you aren't trying to avoid the lorries that are trying to run you over and kill you, yes, I had a relaxing drive. Reached home, had a bath...and wondered when would be the right time to use my new goose feather pillows.

Maybe tonight...I've had a long day...but so did the rest of the world.

At least I've got new soft pillows.